First year with a baby – we made it!

I can honestly say this first year with little Jack has been one of mostly utter shock. To be honest I found late pregnancy and birth quite traumatizing and isolating. Despite the fact I have many gorgeous friends who have little children,  it really comes down to you and only you. How you cope. How you handle it. How you heal. No two experiences are the same and no matter how you read / google / question / share – nothing really prepares you.

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I look back on this amazing, spectacular, scary, beautiful year with happiness and relief. It takes time to feel like you are back on planet earth. And it takes time to feel like a normal human being again when you walk down the street. I felt like everyone could see how scared I was, how squeezed into my jeans I was and how my boobs ached. I felt like they were thinking ‘where has that fabulous confident sassy woman gone?’

But now I am back. Back to feeling like me again. Back to fitting into my clothes with ease. Back to worrying about ‘normal’ things instead of crazy things like rolling onto your baby while you sleep or a stranger with germs giving him the measles in M&S.

To all those mums finding their way back to themselves, never doubt you will get there in your own time.  And when you finally do, welcome back

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